What to expect on February 14th

I know I can't be the only one, there must be someone else; someone with the same kind of panic. The same terror to that day in particular, this damn time of the year. No, it's not Christmas, it's worse. Much worse; full of red but with so many different times tones of pink that you can't count or distinguish or stand them. A ton of anatomically incorrect hearts floating around in the environment, all those too expensive flowers filling the air of every store with pollen. I'm not allergic to Valentine's Day, it's the pollen, I swear. It's the most tiring day of the year, even if this year it falls on Sunday.

Well then, what can you expect from February 14th?

Being single, you surely long the time when the tv, the people, the radio, the clouds and your nosey aunt remind you of how pathetic your life is because you don't have anyone to declare your love to on this day, that you'll end up alone, that you'll probably wake up one day with 26 cats and a turtle named Freddy. Freddy simply because you needed someone to sing Freddy my lo-ove to and the cat number 17 scratched you when you tried. You're obviously dying to see all the romantic comedies that they transmit on that day. You can't be more excited because you'll see your crush giving flowers and chocolates to that slut that slept with the whole footy team (I've heard that they were all the same time), seriously though just tell him, he gotta be joking, that anorexic bitch will throw the chocolates away all the same. You know in that corner paragraph I think it could go like: I know that people say that love is just round the corner, but what if there's Gandalf yelling at you that you shall not pass?! Finding love can be hard, but be sure that you should not look for it on Lovers' Day. Don't let the name deceive you.

Ah, what if...you're not single? Then you gotta hold on to something. I hope that you've been saving the whole year in some pink little pig that reads "In case someone stands me long enough". Because, darling, if you thought that Christmas was capitalism's beloved girl, The Day of Love and Friendship used to beat the shit out of her during recess. You'll have to be a perfect gentleman and if you're a woman, you'll be a princess. You can't let the Fourteenth arrive with that pimple on your forehead; with the way things are they may confuse you with a unicorn. Maybe your boyfriend will take you balloning, perhaps your girlfriend will give you lots of cupcakes made by her own two hands that read 'I love you Brayan'. Perhaps you'll be one of the "lucky ones" that get a handful of roses and a diamond ring in hopes of spending the rest of your lives together.

Even though being single or not there's always a possibility that you'll end up at a bar, having a deep talk about life, heartbreak and suffering with the bartender.

It sounds frightening, I know. But if fear gets to you, you are allowed to use my technique. Just remember that it's one more day, meditate it during the 13th, if someone loves you he'll do it the whole year, if he only thinks about you on February 14th then it is because he already sold his soul to Carlos Slim* and maybe even fucked Donald Trump. So...run, Stupidity is contagious!

*richest man in the world, Mexican btw